In the past week, I have experienced several hilarious text conversations. Because my phone is lame and is constantly telling me that I need to delete my messages in order to receive more, I am documenting those conversations on here so I can always remember them and so my phone will stop whining at me.
So here they are:
Conversation #1: Co-Worker Collin
Collin: [gross picture of a bleeding, sliced eye]
Me: Ewwwww. Why must you send me these gruesome pictures?
Collin: It's from one of my textbooks haha
Me: You poor unfortunate soul.
Collin: In pain, in need. I'm not a very busy woman, though.
Me: Haha oh but you are, Collin. You truly are.
Collin: Did you get that I was doing little mermaid?
Me: Haha yes of course I did, Collin! How dare you question my Disney song repertoire.
Conversation #2: Childhood–Present BFF Ashley
Me: Earth to servant, this is queen. Wilk plan is a go.
Ashley: On my way! My carriage should be arriving there soon.
Me: If by your carriage you mean your wooden cart pulled by cows.
Conversation #3: Rambunctious Ryan
Ryan: Pizza is going to be at 7:45. By the way.
Me: Sounds goody good good good.
Ryan: Goog
Ryan: ...
Ryan: Good
Me: Goooog! Haha. Is that how you say "good" in your native troll language?
Ryan: No, it is actually how I say I'm going to burn your house down tonight...with you tied up in the attic, next to an equally doomed sloth with a Cara t-shirt on (in honor of human Wednesday). Ours is an odd language.
Me: Hahahaha! Oh dear me. May God have mercy on my soul.
Conversation #4: Mirthful Mother
Mom: Home safe?
Me: Haha yes. That was a little delayed.
(She sent the message about two hours after I had already arrived back to my house.)
Mom: Your response or my inquiry?
Me: Haha your inquiry of course.
Mom: Oh haha to you.
Me: Let me laugh mother, let me laugh.
Mom: I am just thinking that I am so funny, so child you let your mother laugh or at least just think that I am funny.
Me: I do think that you're funny! That's the whole reason I was saying haha so much.
Conversation #5: Fretting Father
Dad: Do you understand that it is dangerous to stay logged into Facebook even when you're not using it?
Me: Yes, I always log out when I'm done using it.
Dad: I just read a story about a college boy that gained control of the camera on several teenage girls' computers and took pictures of them nude. He tried to use the pictures to blackmail them. Google "hack Facebook accounts" to see how easy and dangerous it can be. The only way you can be safe is when you're not connected to the internet at all, so limit your exposure!
Dad: And do you close your laptop when you're not using it?
Me: Well that's super creepy. Yes, I always close my laptop and put it away in its case.
Dad: I thought so. Good job.
Well, now I'm off to delete these from my phone. I've noticed that I use "haha" a lot while I'm texting. Hopefully that's not annoying to people, but it probably is because I even started to annoy myself just reading how many times I wrote it in those texts. I guess I just want people to know when they make me laugh. Maybe I should just use a dollar sign or something to signify that I am laughing instead of saying "haha" all the time. That'd be funny.
The money is with the funny.
Haha.
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